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Music 2000

by The Boys

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1.
I'm pretty much a motherfucking vampire I'm so pale I get sunburns at night time Black trench coat and a crewcut Forever young, cause I never grew up And I'm on that liquid diet too, Bud Light In my mitt when i sit in a dark room sip On that ice cold brew, when you listen to this shit I'm draining your life force, it's like getting bit By young Robert Pattinson and you're Bella Swan So let's get it on, we're doing it doggystyle Howling at the moon, baby maybe I'm a werewolf too It's all good as long as I'm with you And as we slow dance in the dark My silver fangs glitter like the night stars Two little scars on your neck, no need to be alarmed Just a vampire peck, it's my tiny sign of love Love triangles Lines between you and I Made with acute angles These boys are feeling Lost Blank slate like John Locke I glitter in the sun cause you know I'm getting hot Day Walker, Blade Runner, late night lover Count Dracula's castle in Transylvania Dancing with the devil like out of Tasmania When we see the moon then you gonna feel the mania This heart so cold it will give you hypothermia Don't let anyone treat you like you were diarrhoea Cause I wanna hold you close and that's a good idea So I pull my cape round us you can't see us in the mirror And as we slow dance in the dark My silver fangs glitter like the night stars Two little scars on your neck, no need to be alarmed Just a vampire peck, it's my tiny sign of love (Oooh) Welcome to the Boyzone (Oooh) We making holes in the ozone Layer with our lyrics, motherfucker what Watt, what? Unit of power Boys are back again and hasn’t been an hour Up on a ladder turning back the clocks Teeth grown back after smoking rocks Memories packed up in a cardboard box Years go by in rewind Reminding yourself of different times Worse than speed, up all night E’s equal this MC shares Its all relative, like porn these days And so I just sit back and I blaze Like a Vampire waiting in the shade Biding my time, I am Legend I need to heel, that’s a leg end Until then The Boys are back again 21st century schizoid men Boy you're a perfect ten But I'm a one in a million son I'm riding a white tiger Still chilling 'til the very end You're M. Bison, I'm Ken Live young, die fast See your life flash past your eyes When I chi blast like a Super Saiyan Hadoken, don't get up or I'll hadoken again Kameha, kamehameha I float like flappy bird, Sting like a Police, You'll end up a butterfly in a bell jar Make you feel weak in the knees When I hit you with these bars So you wanna be a rap superstar Nah man, I wanna take a hit from the bong And download some MP3s off Kazaa Wazaap! The Boys going Ghostface, you casper Hauntology shit like we were Derrida Spitting pop culture, goin Zizekian One in a million, two in a billion, Boys fuckin up the odds cus we keep on killin 'em If the past is a memory Memories are fallible Did the past even exist? Uh so that just happened Breaking the 4th wall in your brain hole Blowing smoke out, when your face falls End of history, start of the century You’re the man now dog, Boys got a destiny Just don’t call us millennials Cus we too slippery for those labels Breaking out the prison of the mind Got the plans tattooed on my spine So sit in the inflatable seat Get this on your ipod on repeat These new sounds are the old sounds Welcome to Music 2000 (2000, 2000, what?)
2.
Lawless 02:47
I'm the boy Lucy Lawless (x4) Im a tiger, you're a pussycat, clawless Clueless, Alicia Silverstone I'm the boy Lucy Lawless Leather vest, hair black Head to toe Gucci swag, looking gorgeus I'm fuckin flawless, more or less Well maybe more than less but I'm moreish Like primo crack, make it clap when I zap Past your lazy ass in a Ford Taurus You're a tortoise, I'm a walrus Yo we lawless, flawless Like you stood on a trap door Rope round your neck, Boys leave you breathless Going like Bermuda, cus we Reckless, For us it's all about the execution Don’t sell yourself short like a dwarf into prostitution Got big ambitions like getting out of bed Inspirational rhymes like a talk with Ted Do a power stance Vitruvian man diagram Well liked like a foetal photo on Instagram Get playing this shit through the ultrasound Goin post-partum It's how ya mama gets down Heads up when head downtown Girl you better sex up with a red dress Or a night gown, yeah we get around, I'm a hound Let's do it in the metro Piccadilly line, London underground I'm the boy Lucy Lawless (x4) Two boys but we're both like four of us So I guess we're quarters, but there's more boys Than Mordor has warlords, we don't cut corners So time to square up, I'm about to flare up Frisbee golf with chakram, dressed like a true Scotsman Put your hair up, I'm about to cut your fucking head off Defeat is not an option, lawless, ruthless, princess Taking care of business Yo I’m clueless, gormless Goin stupid in the club like I’m Forrest Bubba Gump gonna make me jump Like a shrimp into the net Butterfly, sugar, baby Yo so twist, rummy gin When I’m rummaging in the running gym Nose running, snorting ketamine Lets get it going, Pour a pint of bitter better Boy on Boy bars made of letters Getting wetter, super soaker Cigarette lit from my last spliff Chainsmoking like a blacksmith Tripping like on a slipped diff Got you pausing like an old gif Goin fast forward Cus we the Boy Lucy Lawless Flawless George Michael, yeah Psilocybin make you say Way So let me hear you say
3.
(The Boys never die, we're forever man) Death is calling me, ignore him Let it go to voice mail cause I'm immortal I'm in freefall smoking weed That's the Boys' way Trojan horse full of ketamine Looking like ghostface Hogan on my gold chain Hulk Hogan on my gold chain +2 gray dragon scale mail, Gucci boots When I play Madden '98 Shareware via snail mail I remember back in the day When the world was smaller Or, so they say, Under the influence of being ignorant Too many baths makes you impotent Culture for me made me a basic bitch, Basically bored I guess Get rich or die fast and furious Your whole lifes a void in a village Desktop PC in the the living room Family watching tv and I’m in the chat room Seein rotten stuff while downloading tunes I do online quizzes to find out my IQ Old man saying to himself remember when Livin cliché like them rose tinted spex Miss them days when it was the wild wild west Give anyone a slap like you goin Will Smith Who the fuck are you? I could care less I'm the sound of silence, a whisper, careless I'm timeless, spaceless, Lucy Lawless, pure awareness I'm the universe made flesh I'm a higher being manifest in a hot Boy body Smoking weed like Gandhi Legs in lotus under bodhi tree, satori I am godly, nothing more nothing less Probably, I guess I'm a reflection of the moon I glisten in a Mountain Dew drop, I am pure love Listen when I make it clap with one hand Caught me speeding down memory lane Caught me sipping on the wrong holy grail Caught me spitting when I talk, pissing where I walk Catch me if you can like you Tom Hanks, son You be talkin dumb like you Tom Hanks’ son Critic of nostalgia cus I don’t remember People sayin ‘Hey Boy’ but I don’t know where I met ya Ears always burning cus someone always yapping Mic always burning cus The Boys always rapping Green always burning cus I dont leave the house without it Wheels always turning like Tina Turners shouting Look forever young cus my face emotionless Can’t fake enthusiasm like Ricky copying David We Boys like Michelangelo Spinning nunchucks, uppercut Brains on the ceiling like the Sistine, bud Boys blowing your mind, you going Dwyer in the club Takin shots to the head, playing with oblivion Just wait til we’re uploaded into a big robot brain And the moon's a giant gun
4.
Getting high the crew (Just us 2) Sippin on that blue juice (It’s a blue thing) I’m tryna talk to you (Can’t get through) If communications key then whats the lock If unitys the goal then whats the prob Whats your love language Call Michel Thomas I aint got any baggage babe I just carryon with the carryon (great) I don’t fly first class Cus I’m more like the pilot Got that Icarus syndrome Don’t know how to get down We flyin in the sky now Getting high off these clouds Flying higher than a killer drone Exploring our inner zone I spread my wings like an eagle I'm sleeping on a seagull Clouds are my beddings Silver linings, count your blessings The moon is shining, the sun is setting We're aligning our chakras Sending you good vibrations like a fancy buttplug Cause we know that you love us And we love you too, sipping on blue juice Sharing is caring, we're like Mr. Beast on YouTube Got that Icarus syndrome Don’t know how to get down We flyin in the sky now Getting high off these clouds Got that Icarus syndrome Don’t know how to get down We flyin in the sky now Getting high off these clouds Cirrus high and wispy Stratus long and thin Cumulus like a drawing Nimbostratus when it rains But my favourite kinda cloud Is the kind you blow out Frequent flyer miles Cus we always getting high Call me son of Daedalus Wax on my back like I’m virgin goin on 40 Flying was never dangerous With the Wright brother Got no fear of falling So you can hang with us Come glide with us Going Bill Withers Just the two of us Got that Icarus syndrome Don’t know how to get down We flyin in the sky now Getting high off these clouds My vape pen is my jetpack And I'm ascending like I'm playing Nethack Flying to space and back again, no jetlag Ran out of juice on the dark side of the moon Yo Houston we have problem, no money, no biggie Yo hit me up on Cash App my username's Gollum Sponsored by Squarespace Subscribed to cyclical time I've been high this entire time I get frequent flyer miles from my dealer My eyes are bright red and dry, must be hayfever Got that Icarus syndrome Don’t know how to get down We flyin in the sky now Getting high off these clouds Got that Icarus syndrome Don’t know how to get down We flyin in the sky now Getting high off these clouds
5.
Yo! I'm your worst fucking nightmare If your worst nightmare Is some guy making music in his room I'm in the mosh pit drinking Jack Daniels You're acting like a corpse, I'm acting like a cannibal Head banging like a bucking bronco Don't have a cow or I hit that fucking combo And I don't give a fuck, give a fuck! You know we don't give a fuck, give a fuck! You wanna know why we don't give a fuck don't give a fuck Then shut the fuck up and turn the fucking music up Party with The Boys like it's 1999 Cause we gonna rock this goddamn town tonight Party with The Boys like it's 1999 Cause we gonna rock this goddamn town tonight Printing image macros on the ink jet De-motivational posters off the Internet Got Yoda smoking weed as a JPEG Or maybe you more into Goatse dot CX We at the 7/11 24/7 Plasma TV screens showing 9/11 GWB asking me to join the marines So I practice with the DE on cs_italy On the 56k on my CRT MDMA shaped like Mitsubishi On that raw shit, you know, sushi Party with The Boys like it's 1999 Cause we gonna rock this goddamn town tonight Party with The Boys like it's 1999 Cause we gonna rock this goddamn town tonight Crazy, Terry A. Davis Bad boy, mad boy since I was a baby Skater boy, hater boy, everybody hates me Fuck mom and fuck this life that she gave me She's like "yo clean my room" I'm like "fuck you, make me, bitch" I'm a juggalo, smoke a lotta dro, fuck a ho I'm a juggalo, smoke a lotta dro, fuck a ho Drinking Faygo Give me stuff to break, I'll grab a dirty plate Smash it on your face, how does it taste Strawberry cake Filled with my motherfucking hate! Alright Juggalos It's time to split up and Get ready for the wall of life Party with The Boys like it's 1999 Cause we gonna rock this goddamn town tonight Party with The Boys like it's 1999 Cause we gonna rock this goddamn town tonight Yo lemme tell you what I hate (what) I hate when my mom drops me off at the mall I hate it when coach makes me throw a ball I hate these record companies Making money from these goddamn pop charts But most of all I hate Goddamn warm beer! 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 B.O.Y. B.O.Y. B.O.Y. 'til I die Party with The Boys like it's 1999 Cause we gonna rock this goddamn town tonight Party with The Boys like it's 1999 Cause we gonna rock this goddamn town tonight
6.
Timecop Killaz x 16 Blast your ass back in the past where you belong This ain't some boomer coomer shit, the year is 2004 We got supersonic guns firing subatomic particles We be reading memes not articles, everything's remarkable Take a quantum leap, 9mm neocortical, eternal sleep Send your ass back to Tartarus, your brain's dripping Down the fucking street like a Dali timepiece Counting bodies not sheep Your outlook looking bleak I put the DM in tryptamine Turn your clock back like it was GMT Producers addicted to them VSTs So why the fuck aren’t you making beats? Why the fuck are you still trying to be Ye? I can see through your sunglasses you geek (Yo) Shout out all the mathematicians Especially the fit ones Bend over, show me that venn diagram Meet in the middle like a hotdog man Double Impact going Claude Van Damme Boys spitroasting like a lamb kebab To be honest I dunno if I’m into that Making eye contact over her back with another man, Do you smile at him? Can’t even piss if you stood next to me Lookin at pipework like I’m saving a screen Shy bladder, balls getting fatter Rat a tat tat on the door while I’m tooting my horn (just a minute) Snort it up, lick the seat, then we going oh-wah-ah-ah-ah Like a freak on a leash, We doing time crimes. we doing time crimes Call me Groundhog cus every day I’m doing crime We doing time crimes. we doing time crimes Call me Groundhog cus every day I’m doing crime Time heist, nick your wristwatch Looks like a Swatch, swiss made, it's precise It will fetch a nice price in the time shop A time cop caught us by surprise Now he's reading our rights Should be reading last rites Cause my Glock ain't no prop So I pop pop pop a cap, one in his crotch Five right between his eyes Feds drop like flies nonstop Shots fired when the Boys ride In a drop top, chop chop No lingering, leave no fingerprints Wet wipes in the glove box Silver fangs shimmering Here's a piece of good advice Better think twice, make it thrice Or you gonna get iced Timecop Killaz x 16
7.
I’m taking on your top 8 We talking on MSN until late Trading pictures like they was pokemon cards We evolving like we goin Charizard Past asking ASL, going IRL Tonight’s free like a CD from AOL We like a CRT cus I think we interlaced Babe I’m takin you back to Myspace We get in a taxi, your head on my shoulder I drift off to sleep it’s a long way home yeah You wake me up and I look around Cars parked up with no driver about So we get out we in some old factory Dust on the floor smells like a cattery Chains and shit hanging from the ceiling You know I’m starting to get a bad feeling Then I think I hear wheels squeaking Out from the shadows a puppet comes wheeling With a spooky voice is says our names Then it goes I want to play a game Sounds all right cause gaming is my life I'm playing CS Source all night Five days at Freddy's, weekend at Bernie's No worries, this ain't scary The little man is wilding riding on a kids' bike With training wheels, he's gaining speed Popping wheelies, I don't know what his deal is I'm staying alive like Bee Gees, I was born to game, I'm half man and Half Life 2 That's a full life and half a man to boot ASDF when I move, left click to shoot, Click clack boom, head shot gimme the loot Click clack boom when I step into the room Blasting both barrels like the guy outta Doom When I wake up I hit it like it was snooze New nightmare what thy flesh consumed This trap rap is a rat trap Like a white guy trying to rap fast It's Good to avoid the obvious So fuck a piece of cheese, cus I want the block Smoke a cloud a green, going tommy chong Better Follow your dreams, only scary ones Meanwhile The puppet on the trike turns out alright But he doesn’t chip in when we getting high Some people never buy drugs But they happy to take them This puppet chats shite Fact, we fuckign hate him So we hatch a scheme of our own Gonna fuck this guy up So he wishes he wasn't born Pinocchio in reverse, oh eek oh nip Best damage type is always ironic This cunt's bike is gonna be his downfall So we set it up, going full Knoxville Gets on his trike and pedals away When he goes downhill he knows he got no brakes Keeps getting faster and faster Hits a ramp, through a window, glass shatter Lands conveyer belt that puts him through machines Comes out the end in a box one thousand piece And if you think helmets are lame you bell-end You better never tell anyone to play a game Cause we dont play, we're griefing going for a teamkill Jigsaw's missing pieces, like his fucking brain
8.
Tesco Garage 03:46
Yeah And you know that I know Cus we going Scorpio Gotta catch this tail Before you feel the sting Not the first time this frog’s crossed the stream Yo, cus when I’m feelin me Feel possibility of you and me Lying in bed every Saturday Can you feel the G Not Gravity You missing motivation Don’t play me like PlayStation No Don’t leave me waiting like you Staying up late to watch babestation Boys hopping to the beat We going every week Don’t have a bed cus I don’t go to sleep We drinking blue drinks Losing count of sheep Nikes on my feet And lips on my cheek Parking up at Tesco lookin so fleek Cus Boys are rolling 8 days a week What? What do you mean what? The Boys are coming up fast, Gatorade and Buckfast We're the future you're still stuck in the past Shut the fuck up you're tryna outlast the everlasting, stop We masking up, catch me if you can but you won't catch up Baby we were born to run, spun Let's go Tesco we're just having fun Burberry dress code, this is Tesco not the UNESCO So if you wanna knuckle up, better buckle up Your face gonna look like a restored fresco My smile Glasgow, your smile asshole My eyes black holes your eyes black and blue Cause you fucked with the motherfucking Boys Fucking with the boys You wanna fill a void Fuck yourself with toys Going through these bags Like they packets of McCoys Favourite flavours enterprise Ask Leonard Nimoy Eat half a crisp That’s a semi-quaver Wanking limp dicks That’s a semi-waver Cut lines with clubcards And we Don’t need saving Boys going hard Dancing in graveyards When we hit the rave Better ring the alarm Tongues so sharp Cutting these words in ha- Chewing tree bark You wanna fuck with us Meet us in the car park Don’t forget the change though Getting an Asbo at Tesco KD ratio better than Warzone Punching you like holes in the Ozone Wha? Fuck Sainsbury's clique I'll bury those pricks like a ned John Wick We're the Tesco crew, keeping it real like fake news Self-checkout, no queues Irn-Bru in my veins for the gains Gotta pour a little on my homeboy's grave Digging him up to steal their gold chain, ka-ching I'm rubber, you're glue My pills uppers, your pills blue I'm L. Ron Hubbard, you're you End up in the gutter there's nothing you can do And it's raining blood, when it rains it pours Like a biblical flood guarantee ya Waterworld Tesco, not a bad idea Car park marina, put some oars on your Kia Pour me a beer, my Landlord going Lear Going Romeo cus his daughter works here Riding on the trolley like a rodeo No bullshit, nowhere to go Alone by the deli with coke up my snout I’m getting busy chatting up the self checkout Unexpected baggy in the bagging area Catch me roaming, I give you a Caesarean I’ll give you action like you on Police, Camera Makin flame throwers with a can of Lynx Africa Melt cops faces like Im opening up the Covenant They planting evidence like the Blair government Velcro on my shoes so they don’t take my laces Better do the whole bag when you get arrested Feeling great in a cell at a cellular level When I get out straight back at Tesco Ghost in a shell suit Major incident when I come through At Tesco every day's a party The Boys are gonna get it started Yo so put your hands in the air Yeah we here all day yeah Lasses screaming out the sun roof Big tunes with the Boys crew Blaze it up if you got it If not, what the fuck you doing? We got Tesla and Bugatti We got Stella and Bacardi If you really wanna party Better validate your parking Parking in the dark you like going dogging Going bark bark when the police come plodding Tucking bottoms into socks when you going robbing Sparking up a big biff when I go shopping And don't come knocking when the van is rocking The Boys in the carpark, ain't no stopping Ain't no stopping When The Boys are parking Tes to the Co to the B to the O to the Y to the S Don't you go toe-to-toe With the best, that's the Boys Doing blow in a raspberry red '96 Volvo, now you know
9.
(Yep, yep) I'm a dolphin Swimming in an ocean of morphine No gills, No limbs, ice grills Fourteen karat custom gold fins This some E.C.C.O. shit, Free Willy Doing ketamine with John C. Lilly And thanks for all the fish, bitch With the ball on my nose I don't miss, swish I got three keys of seaweed and I don't need a bong I'm smoking on that deep sea shit out of a conch Hup, hup, hup, hup Going Dolphin Style Girl grab my fin cus we gonna go for a ride Put your lips on my blowhole when we deep sea dive Going Captain Ahab on this Moby Dick, dick, dick Yeah we doing backflips beneath the Titanic Coast to Coast like Space Ghost across the Atlantic You thinking you Bill Murray cus this Life’s Aquatic Don’t wear a condom cus you’ll choke on that plastic When I go down I don’t need a snorkel Girl that pussy wetter than the ocean Got a higher bodycount than Tilikum Got you goin like (dolphin noise) Yeah we on that ocean vibe, going full Brian Eno The tide is high, and I don't care about Nemo Clownfish coat by Christian Dior Shoes Ferragamo, don't have any feet though No need though Call me bottlenose when I get drinking Tequila Sunrise in the evening Without even blinking an eye That's how we do it SeaWorld style Yo, let that shit sink in Sirens are singing some shit like Don't cha wish your boyfriend was a dolphin like me Don't cha, don't cha, c'est la vie Smoking doja, that's just the way of the sea Mermaid, Merman Have you got some coke man? Yo I chuck an ounce in the ocean Homeopathy in the sea, fluid motion This Charlie don’t surf, it just gets absorbed yeah The Boys are dolphins, Animorphs style Flicking page after page, evolutionary lines Flipping flippers, catching waves, big Wednesday vibes Going wild for them ancient mariner rhymes You watching Adult Swim, I’m watching adults fuck Down on the ocean floor like Sealab 2021 Deeper, Marinara, call me father, Going darker, Chicken Tikka Massala Cowabunga, goin Orca Bottom feeder going under You know when the boys turn into dolphins there’s going to be thunder Driving down the street in Lambos filled with water Fuck with us you gonna get run over That’s seacide (It's the Boys, it's the Boys) Even God took a day off Try to pull that shit off in the Boys And you gonna get laid off I'm the male JLo, fuego Juggalo, Faygo David Koresh, Waco Loverboy like Plato Hindsight like Galileo Don't slam the fucking door No more, Winnebago Man I'm making beats using just my left hand While my right hand is playing Halo Got me poppin up like Kenobi sayin Hello There’s more lines in my head than on the Packard Bell logo You want a mate better get Bonzi Buddy on download Doing backflips on my desktop, destined for big things you know

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released June 1, 2023

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we're just two cosmopolitan country boys riding this supersonic speedboat right off the goddamn cliff and smoking big blunts in the freefall

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